Family Wedding Drama?!?

hpdrew15

So my fiance and I have set our wedding date for August 4th of 2012 and my fiance's brother has set his wedding date for September 29th of 2012. I've been engaged since last november, which his parents said they were not going to recognize, and my fiance gave me my ring at the end of June. Well a week after that his brother proposed to his girlfriend. They set their date and asked us to stay away from september, so we did. Two of my siblings are teachers, so the school year doesn't really work for us and my aunt who lives out of state works for the courts of her city; so the end of fiscal year, which is up in July, doesn't work for her either.

My fiance and I are having a very laid back Lutheran ceremony and our reception is at a bowling alley. His brother is having a very formal Catholic ceremony and a very formal reception at a reception lodge. We have been figuring things out for our wedding since last November and we decided on the colors purple (my favorite color and my grandma's, who passed away 7 years ago), green (my second favorite color) and silver as an accent. I have bridesmaids dresses ordered, along with all my stationary ordered.

I just found out today that his brothers colors are the same and now my fmil is asking us to change our date, which we can't do, or to change our colors, which I can't do either. I'm so upset right now, I have never felt like his family accepts me and I'm just about ready to say that I'm done with his family all together.

My fiance has told his mother that we are not changing and now she is accusing us of not caring about his brother. We don't feel like his family is supporting us at all, ever since the beginning of our relationship and now they don't care for our wedding and our choices. I'm so fed up with his family and I'm about to totally lose it.

Am I wrong to be upset? Am I wrong to not be willing to change to accomadate his brother? What should I do?
My fiance, my parents and I are the ones paying for the wedding, they have offered no support or help. They never even ask us how things are going.

As for religion, his family is Lutheran as well, it's his brother's fiance that is Catholic. And I would never ever marry into the Catholic faith.

My fsil and fbil are the ones that have the problems with the colors being the same and they are the ones that dragged their mother into it. She always sides against my fiance.

And there have been many many more large problems with his family that make me want to be done with them, it's not just this. Our contact with his family is already very minimal, they don't even know that we have moved. So if we made contact anymore minimal than it already is, we wouldn't be talking to them at all.

And I have told them that I can't change my date or colors, they knew this when they asked us to change our details.

Daver: I am not wrong to be this upset, seeing as this is not the first major problem tha
My fiance, my parents and I are the ones paying for the wedding, they have offered no support or help. They never even ask us how things are going.

As for religion, his family is Lutheran as well, it's his brother's fiance that is Catholic. And I would never ever marry into the Catholic faith.

My fsil and fbil are the ones that have the problems with the colors being the same and they are the ones that dragged their mother into it. She always sides against my fiance.

And there have been many many more large problems with his family that make me want to be done with them, it's not just this. Our contact with his family is already very minimal, they don't even know that we have moved. So if we made contact anymore minimal than it already is, we wouldn't be talking to them at all.

And I have told them that I can't change my date or colors, they knew this when they asked us to change our details.

Daver: I am not wrong to be this upset, seeing as this is not the first major problem tha
Daver: I am not wrong to be this upset, seeing as this is not the first major problem that we have had with them. And they will not support us, because they don't like me and I'm wouldn't have the faintest idea as to why.

Answer
Wow, his family are A-holes! You have every right to be upset. I would not change your colors or anything for that matter. Keep planning your wedding with the colors YOU want and the way YOU want it. It's your wedding, not his mothers or his brothers. If anyone should change colors, it should be your soon to be sister-in-law. Not you.
Just keep planning it, and if his mother keeps going on about how you guys don't care about his brother, someone needs to say to her "oh like everyone cares about us & our wedding"
Eff 'em. And the best of luck to you!!

Which color scheme for July 2012 wedding?!?

Allie M

We'll marry July 14, 2012 in a church then our reception will take place under a tent in the famous gardens in our town.

Option 1) "Peacock/royal" blue bridesmaids dresses with blue wildflowers. My bouquet will be white wildflowers. Note: Blue is our favorite color.. This is bright, summer and just pops! While still being elegant.

Option 2) Slate/gray bridesmaids dresses with white and pink bouquets. Mine will be white and pink flowers as well. It's so soft, elegant and beautiful!!

Which option?

Answer
I think you should split the difference - I think royal blue is too dark for a summer wedding - and grey is too dull, but if you like blue you can still go with something a little further up the light spectrum - go for a lighter shade of blue and you can still have your hints of blue and pink wildflowers but it is more in keeping with the month and time of year

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